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Dogs and Computers - Same or Different?

-- Favorite Food
Dogs: kibbles
Computers: bits

-- Method used to end undesirable behavior
Dogs: hit with rolled up newspaper
Computers: hit control-alt-delete

-- After destruction of personal property
Dogs: dog not found
Computers: file not found

-- Favorite trick
Dogs: roll over
Computers: play dead

-- Comic-page hero
Dogs: Dogbert
Computers: Dilbert

-- Fun way to mess with their heads
Dogs: peanut butter on roof of mouth
Computers: peanut butter in CD-ROM drive

-- Consequence of virus
Dogs: replace valuable carpeting
Computers: replace valuable data

-- Widely ignored government mandate
Dogs: leash law
Computers: Communications Decency Act

Waste disposal tool
D: pooper-scooper
C: uninstaller (necessary only on Win-tel machines!)


Sensitive internal procedures
D: must be undertaken by fully qualified professional
C: may be undertaken by that guy at work who fixed "one kind-of like this" once

Method of marking territory
D: lifting leg
C: "Designed for Windows 95"

Unique behavior
D: lick and drag
C: click-and-drag

Inexplicable physical feature
D: dewclaw
C: scroll lock key

Estimated lifespan
D: 12 years
C: 12 months

At end of useful life
D: euthanasia
C: tax deduction